If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
