You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
