After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
