I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
