Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Randomize
