It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
