i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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