She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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