2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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