I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
