If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
