my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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