she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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