Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
