ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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