I could make wine with my vomit
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
