Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
