She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
