Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
