i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Randomize
