just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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