I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
