North Korea, Best Korea!
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
