I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize