No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
