sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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