What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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