its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
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