i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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