redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize