whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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