Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
