Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
