Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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