then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
