Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
This is classic penis vs brain.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
