I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
