So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize