So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Randomize
