so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
