I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
