hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
