But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
You ate ashes out of my bong
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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