We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize