I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
If I die, sorry about rent.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
