is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
is that a dick in a sweater?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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