I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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