I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Randomize
