ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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