nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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